How to manage kids’ Holiday expectations
22 November 2012
Here comes the Holiday season again. The days are getting shorter, and so are children’s attention spans. Their Holiday wish lists, on the other hand, are getting progressively longer by the day. And who could blame them? Thanks to TV, social media, and their friends, today’s children are constantly exposed to new toys, electronic innovations, and apps.
Meeting family needs is enough of a challenge today from a financial perspective. Adding in all those Holiday wish-list “wants” can be a real strain on both the budgetary and emotional fronts.
So, what to do?
Often it’s just not possible meet your children’s every Holiday expectation. “The potential for disappointment is certainly there,” says Marie-France Haineault, Certified Child Life Specialist at the Montreal Children’s Hospital. “But at the same time, the Holidays present a great opportunity to bring families closer together, and to teach some valuable and useful life lessons.”
“The first step to managing kids’ expectations is to talk openly and honestly with them”, says Ms. Haineault. Ask your children about their wish lists, and then discuss these together. If they’re old enough, you can explain to them that they may not receive every item on their lists this Holiday season. And if they’re still Santa Claus believers, you can tell them that the man at the North Pole is very busy, working to get toys and games to millions of children around the world. You can have them make a Top Ten or Top Five list, and get them to assign priorities to each item on the list. That is, after all, how things are supposed to work in a well-ordered grown-up world! (Well, at least sometimes anyway.)
The joy of giving is a gift itself
“You can also give your children another wonderful Holiday gift,” adds Ms. Haineault. “You can instill in them a strong sense of the joy of giving. That includes gifts in the traditional sense of the word, but also their time, effort and compassion.”
For starters, you can give each child a Holiday to-do list. Tasks will include helping you prepare for the Holidays – as well as acts of kindness, such as visiting an elderly relative, or volunteering at a local food bank. This will help them to develop a greater sense of responsibility toward self, family and community. You might also give your children an advance cash gift – with the suggestion that they should donate all or a portion of this to a worthy charity of their choice.
For those children who haven’t yet earned money of their own, that advance cash gift can also be used to buy gifts for other family members. If they cannot afford to buy small gifts for each family member, you can assign one gift recipient to each junior gift buyer.
A universal message
And what if these Holidays are not your family’s Holidays? Keep in mind that there’s some common ground here. Look at all those bright lights during the shortest, darkest days of the year – a symbol of hope in many cultures. And then there’s the Golden Rule – doing unto others as you would have them do unto you. That’s one of the main tenets of most of the world’s cultures and faiths.
